When Reina finds herself seated next to a 30 year old pop-punk couple on the plane back to San Francisco, she wonders whether they are in on a hidden camera-practical joke being played on her. But alas, she realizes her life is far from a reality TV series and she may not be immunized against the lingering epidemic that is pop-punk, either.
When Reina thinks about Fetty, she tends to think about glaucoma and the witch from Big Fish with the glass eye. But apparently, fetty is slang for money and wap is a nod to Gucci Mane’s nickname Guwop except with an a, so what she should be thinking is money, Gucci, and Rémy Martin 1738 (because that’s apparently “the finest” liquor and why he says 1738, and his crew is called the Remy Boyz. Our boy Fetty is not only classy, but also clever.) He’s got, like, 5 songs on the charts right now, which is cool, but is everyone sure they understand what he is saying in his songs?
Imagine, a meeting with Win and Will Butler: “Let’s make an orchestral indie rock band that has too many people, too many instruments, and is too complex for people to really understand.” “Maybe if we’re lucky, people will pretend to understand it like a Rothko painting or Kafka.” “And let’s throw a hurdy-gurdy into the mix, because people will have to look that up and it will raise our indie cred.” Possibly the only fucking explanation for Arcade Fire. They’re obviously a very talented band judging by the plethora of instruments on stage and Reina isn’t claiming otherwise. She just doesn’t “get” it, you know?
Admitting you shop at Walmart is like saying you listen to Top 40 music or that you like The Twilight Saga. Like Edward Cullen and pop music, Walmart is made for mass consumption, so I guess it makes sense that it’s thought of as a consumeristic nightmare. Also, it makes sense because nothing sold at Walmart is local/organic/sustainable/artisan/gluten-free/vegan/etc. “Made-for-the-masses” is almost synonymous with uncool, isn’t it?
In honor of this barely-dressed Halloween, Reina compiles a list of her favorite, albeit unnecessarily, sexy costumes. Yes, it includes Sexy Banana. And no, Sexy Banana is probably not an allusion to the Velvet Underground. Either way, peel slowly and see.
I live with a pit bull lab mix named Tucker and he’s really cute. As I write this, he’s laying across my stomach, doggie daydreaming about something. Maybe squirrels. I had plans to be “productive” but as soon as I sat down with my computer, I somehow found myself googling “Pitbull”. I think maybe it’s…
You know that video of the guy yelling “What are those?” at the police officer? Of course you fucking do. Everyone does. I literally heard someone yelling that at an old person on the subway last week. I’m willing to admit that I didn’t get what was so funny about that until a little while…